In Honor of Kyle Minogue Edlund, November 26, 1964 – May 10, 20015
“Sometime ago, I was given a treasure to guard and now the owner has wanted it back.”
Beruriah to her husband Rabbi Meir in telling her husband that their son is dead.
I haven’t been actively connecting outward for several months. People have written me and wondered why I wasn’t doing my newsletter any more. My heart just wasn’t in it. For the past 18 months, I have been living with my son, Kyle’s, kidney cancer. From diagnosis to death it was exactly 18 months and 2 days. He was on his way to Lego Land when he started to have symptoms. We all had no idea that when diagnosed, it had already spread and he was at stage 4 from the get go.
This part of the journey with Kyle is complete. He was my sweetheart, my philosopher and truth teller. He was sensitive and smart and it was always complex and interesting just talking with him. To make it even more heart-wrenching, he passed out of here early on Mother’s Day morning. Interesting note is that he was born on Thanksgiving Day and his body died on Mother’s Day. He was in his personal 9 year and had just completed his 7th Soul cycle, the most important cycle of all.
I did the eulogy at his funeral. The whole ceremony was wonderful and his 8 year old daughter spoke. It is the saddest of days to say goodbye to your child. I have buried my friends, my parents, my siblings and been through divorce. Nothing prepares you for the loss of your child. It feels like a terrible sunburn that you cannot touch as the pain would be even worse. So very few people really understand and to talk about it, when a friend asks how are you, is to relive it all over again. I avoid it.
Many of you have contacted me with such loving words and comfort and I do so appreciate you. Thank you so much for your support during this emotional journey of caring for a child that has been given an exit out of here. The last few months were exhausting and I have very conflicted thoughts of at-home death and the whole institutionalized hospice program–set up by health insurance companies.
I am going forward with my work and have been scheduling clients for sessions. It has been not only a way to help others but to also help heal. I am so grateful to have you and look forward to working with you. Many thanks.
In the future, I plan to write some interesting pieces from this journey. You cannot go through it and not be permanently changed. I became much closer to the unseen world and naturally prepare myself for my own journey to it. We all will do it and it is important to remember that every day is your “last chance”. Don’t waste it, don’t take it for granted and really appreciate the very simple but critical things you need in your life. We are downright silly and nuts if we could hear what we get upset about or sound like. It all comes down to needing each other and caring for and about each other. The rest is distraction.
Vice-President Joe Biden lost his own 46 year old son this Saturday to brain cancer. Vice President Biden, who had already lost a wife and child, had spoken at many funerals over his lifetime and one of his quotes from his famous eulogies was the following, “There will come a day, I promise you, and your parents as well, when the thought of your son or daughter or your husband or wife brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye.” I look forward to that day.
Thanks again for your love and support and I look forward to working with you and your groups. Life goes on and it doesn’t wait for us.