I remember many years ago when my former husband was a fighter pilot in Viet Nam, he would say that every day is Wednesday. They bombed every day. It didn’t matter if it was Saturday or Sunday; every day was Wednesday. The comment reminds me of my life today. This Wednesday routine won’t always be the case but it is now in the present and, in reality, that is all I can work in. Saturday and Sunday’s are more of the same as Wednesday. Working from home, self-employed, I can go walk on any day, go to the pharmacy any day, take out food any day, shop at Trader Joe’s any day etc. The only must do week days are doctor appointments. Here is Los Angeles, there are no cultural, sporting events, dining in, open gyms, no pedicures, no hair salons, no bars, weddings, family gatherings of no more than 10 spaced according to law and outside etc. You can swim in the ocean but you can’t lie on the beach. I was standing in line at Walgreen’s and I spotted a woman whose toes had obviously just been done. I asked her where so I have found a clandestine nail salon. Of course, there are clandestine bars etc. Just as in the days of prohibition, people will seek out the unlawful.
Of course, the same goes for funerals. There is hope, of course. I just read in yesterday’s Wall St. Journal about a new Facetime product. It is sort of a Facetime for the dead. You can now purchase a camera ($500) with a remote at the grave site where you can talk to your dead loved one as well as listen. Of course, you also can pick up nearby conversations. If you have a very crowded cemetery, you might not want to have the interference of nearby dead neighbor relatives interfering with your dead Facetime. Also, you pay $12.99 each month for the subscription. So if you can’t make it to the cemetery, you can always do it remotely. What a life!
With all of us going through this “brave new world” scenario, I chuckle at all the plans I made for the last few years and how little control I had over those plans. I am sure you, too, are amazed at the life you are now being forced to live and the uncertainty of our times. However, with enough faith over our fears and the acknowledgment that this too shall pass, we can be proactive in adjusting to our new way of life. I learned long ago the secret of staying young was to lower your resistance to starting over. So here I am with a brand new set of hard conditions and tests of my courage and endurance. It is critical now to look at what is urgent and important versus something that appears urgent or appears important. There is a difference. Pick your most important goal and don’t lose sight of it.
Mine is selling my house and getting out from underneath the heavy burden that goes with a big, old, classic house. There is lots of upkeep, expenses and exhaustion. The goal is to sell it this fall and not lose sight of this goal while everything around me tries very hard to distract me. What is urgent and important is to get this house, sale-ready, partially stage it and move out so it can be sold quickly. Now there are lots of impediments to accomplishing this. But, selling this house allows me to free up all kinds of other choices in my life. This is the number one goal.
The strategy and tactics must be thought through. No military general goes to a battle without a strategy and tactics to win it. What are your battle plans? What is your strategy? What are your tactics? No goal, dream or wish can be yours without sacrifice. You can pay up front or you can pay on the back end. It seems mine will be paid up front. As you know my husband has brain melanoma and has been fighting that for 2 1/2 years. He was doing okay until he had a tremendous fall with severe brain bleeding on February 24th. That sent him back to the hospital, various nursing homes and a rehabilitation hospital. It took all of 4 months of advocacy, fighting, appealing and general forceful behavior to get him well. He managed to survive covid 19 from the nursing home, c-diff, a superbug, from another nursing home and he finally returned home with an horrendous case of athletes foot. What a guy! 25 pounds lighter, with caretakers 16 hours a day, he is gradually and I do mean gradually, starting to get some of himself back. (PS, if your are in your 50’s, consider purchasing long-term care insurance. It pays for about half his care but it is a big lifesaver.)
I tell you this because, in spite of all these setbacks and disappearance of funds, I continue to prepare for an October listing of our home. I never lost sight of the goal. I believe I have arranged (or with the universe’s help) have arranged for rent-controlled space in San Francisco to wait out the sale. I know that the divine wisdom knows better what to do going forward in light of what needs to be done. We need to be clear and not lose sight of the “what” in our lives. What do you want? Covid 19 will be with us a long time just as a bunch of other viruses are with us. We are getting a bit better at treating it and eventually we will have a vaccine. Probably many people will be reluctant to take the vaccine and I understand. My wish is to have really good treatment so if we get the virus, we don’t suffer as much or die as easily.
All of us would benefit from watching the NETFLIX film “CRIP CAMP”. Watch it and then count your blessings. It is a remarkable film and you can’t help but come away feeling blessed and guilty for what we think as a catastrophe. Let’s stay away from over-emphasizing our suffering. Learn to lean into the invisible world, the real world; the world you can depend upon. The man-made world cannot be depended on. It changes daily but the invisible world and universal principles never change. Let them be your comfort and your strength.
I always glean great tidbits of help and insight from your blog and always look forward to them. I would like to unload our home and acreage this fall as it has come to feel so burdensome but my husband is not (yet) on board. He’s a fearful renter. I hope you have great success selling your property and find to your delight that the universe has plans of a lightened load for you. It feels like everyone is experiencing the “dark before the dawn.” Thank you and blessings to you.
Dear Gail, It has been a long time from when I met you while photographing for an event in Arizona, and you remain, through these blogs, part of my experience. Thank you for your knowledge and clarity. I look forward to when I can arrange a reading with you-for now, photography at a quiet time-the remote grave site is a film!- Santa Fe has been a good place to be living. Best to you, sale of your house, and health for you and your husband. You are spot on! with your writings.
Blessings to your husband. He’s a fighter and won’t leave this planet until he is darn good and ready.
Gail, thank you for just being a wonderful light and still, in the midst of the storm offer up encouragement, faith and the most razor focused plan in spite of the veil of Life appearances. When your email appeared, I had a inner excitement which has become a ghost for quite some time but, that little shimmer is all I needed to get back on track. Many blessings to you and Richard every step of the way on your journey to ‘better’ days.
I did not know about your husbands illness. My heart goes out to you for your’s and his experiences. I will immediately begin praying for both him and you. Illness at any age is difficult but illness in your 70’s, 80’s and 90’s is worse because we don’t have the stamina that we did in our 30’s to 50’s.
Thank you for sharing your story and I just found the Netflix “Crip Camp” movie and will watch it at first chance.
I wish you well in selling your home, and finding the best new home for your future.
Love and prayers to you and Richard, Gail. I visualize a rapid sale and closing for your home. Be well and safe.
Adrian and Gorby
You are a blessing to us all with your words of wisdom, and examples of how you handle all your challenges. I’ve been keeping you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers. Every time I feel it’s been a bit long since we’ve heard from you and am tempted to write you a personal note, I just send you more loving energy because I feel you must be bombarded with so much on your end. Still, in the midst of all your challenges you rise up and share your story and words of wisdom once more. Praying for your highest and best. Thank you for all you share with us.
Dear Gail. 2020 seems to be quite a year. Wishing you all the best. Love. Marianne.
Dear Gail, I marvel at your wisdom and at all you are able to accomplish. Love to you and Richard. Hoping for continued improvement! xoxo
Wishing you and Richard all the best, Gail! You have a lot going on and you are an inspiration with your insight about about how to move forward to make your life work better with the challenges especially during the pandemic. We always look forward to your words of wisdom.
Gail I admire your resolve. I have kept you ang your husband in my thoughts and prayers since his fall. I know all will be fine. Not just now but patient’s will reveal the gifts. I too have a very sick family member, my daughter. She suffers a terrible lung condition. She should be gone already; however, she pushes on each day. Power above are incharge and the Universe has the plan. So continued health, spirit, and time for you and your beloved husband. Suzan
Thanks so much for your reading back in early 2019 when I was downsizing and planning to move. I found a great apartment using the numerology as a guide and have now been here over a year! Wishing you the best in your downsizing and move!
Oh, Gail, my heart goes out to you. I will hold you in my thoughts, heart and prayers that the house prep and sale may go as smoothly as possible.
FYI: I have been inspired to create the Grid of Light on http://TheVisionHolders.org as my part of trying to make a positive difference at this time.
I was called to do an earlier version of this in 1994 and told then it was a “dress rehearsal”. Now that makes sense to me.
It takes 3 minutes to sign u for the Grid and be located on the world map. I would love to have your energy in the Grid.
Know that I will be thinking of you. That’s a heavy stack. Sending you stamina ❤️
Thanks Gail. Great house you have in an always sought-after area of LA! I’m right behind you except going south!